Monday, December 10, 2007

Homecoming 2007










Friday was a very special day for my boys and I. My son Joseph was selected as male homecoming representative from his grade. He and my eighth grade son, David, attended their first dance. I must mention here that I never attended any dances growing up, much less was I elected to represent my grade at one of these events. In a nutshell, I have always been rather shy and somewhat geeky. Some of my friends might even take exception to my use of the qualifier, “somewhat”. Joe wrote about it on his blog here. He also posted photos here. David posted about it here and posted photos here.

Needless to say I was extremely proud to learn about Joe’s selection. My boys attend a school that doesn’t have a football team so they have homecoming festivities during the basketball season. Joe is a rather quiet, hard working boy who loves the outdoors. He has always been a bit on the shy side, like his dad. He is very interested in cars, trucks, music, fishing, hunting, camping, and sports, especially football. He is a very smart kid with a great personality. He has always been very uninterested in girls. One thing that hasn’t changed about Joe is that it is difficult to get him wear something dressier than blue jeans. His mom was unable to get him to do it Friday. If he was with me that afternoon, I might have forced him to.

Before the basketball game I took pictures of Joe and his friends. He was walking around, socializing with other children and sitting with the girl he was escorting, Ashley. That alone made it a “coming out” of sorts for Joe. Just a year ago you couldn’t have dragged him kicking and screaming into this role. Now, all of a sudden, he was embracing it and fulfilling it tremendously. It was an awesome sight to see him walk out onto the court with Ashley, arm in arm, as their names and parents’ names were called.

Then came the dance. Just the fact that he was willing to attend the dance was amazing in itself. I had the boys that night and I decided to stay with them for the dance. Their mom pulled me aside and asked me not to attend. When I told her that I had decided to do it, she told me to stay away from them. I can only speculate as to why she was saying all of this, but I think one reason was that she was afraid that I would embarrass them. I was in agreement with her that I needed to give them some space, but I disagreed that it would be a problem for me to attend. She did not attend the dance. I am so glad I did. If I had not attended, I would have missed out on one of the best evenings of my life.

My youngest son Matthew and I sat in the corner most of the time. Amazingly, despite my efforts to maintain a low profile, my boys and their friends came over and talked with me a lot. I must have had 5-10 girls asking me to get David and Joe to dance with them. I really didn’t want to interfere. But after about thirty minutes of Joe sitting by me and watching David wander around the dance floor by himself with his arms crossed, I couldn’t take it any more. First, I whispered to Joe that he needed to ask Ashley to dance with him at least one time. I told him that she would feel really bad if he didn’t. He reluctantly said that he would think about it. Then he said that she had already asked him and he had said that he didn’t want to do it. I told him he needed to dance with her and that he would be glad later if he did. I told David the same thing. I told him that he would probably regret it later if he didn’t do it. I also told him that I was too shy when I was his age and that if I could go back and change things I would. I asked him to at least think about it.

Matthew is the one who usually is best known for his “girlfriends”, dancing, and outgoing personality. That was not the case on this occasion. After his first dance, Joe was “hooked” and basically danced with Ashley most of the rest of the time. He didn’t seem the least interested in dancing with anyone else. There were a lot of girls who seemed disappointed that he wouldn’t dance with them. Once David danced the first time, he ended up dancing the rest of the evening with several different girls.

One of the teachers kept taking pictures of David every time that he danced with a different girl. Every time she took a picture she would come over laughing and show me. I took lots of pictures once they started dancing. There came a point, though, I could sense it was becoming a bit more than they wanted so I scaled back toward the end. Maybe it was when they kept complaining about the flash or when they kept sneaking off to the other side of the room. I got the hint.

It seemed like David and Joe had the time of their life. Matthew had fun too, but he was pretty tame compared to usual. He even refused to dance with another little girl his age. I really cannot explain the emotions that I was feeling watching this spectacle. I was so proud seeing my boys turning into young men right before my eyes. Seeing how they conducted themselves socially, using good manners, showing their personalities, and overcoming their shyness was an awesome sight. I do not think that I am overstating it to say that Friday night was their “coming out” event. They will never be the same. They are transitioning into young men now. That transition is not all fun and games. As a matter of fact, I had to deal with a lot of rebelliousness, immaturity, and disrespect from one of them later in the weekend.

Friday night was a night I will always remember and cherish. I will think back to that night many times in the future. That was the best Christmas gift that I will receive this year. I literally would not have missed it for the world. Ultimately, I must give thanks to God. I have prayed for and cared for these boys every day since before they were born. My dad always told me that he wanted me to succeed even more than he did. When I was a child I never understood that. I do now. It is the essence of love. Thank you Lord for giving me the opportunity, responsibility, joy, and even difficulty that comes with raising David, Joseph, and Matthew. I pray that your hand would always be on their lives.

4 comments:

Tom said...

Feeling old yet, Buddy?

Mike Wilhelm said...

You know I am Tom...

Anonymous said...

Cool pictures -- I'm guessing mine will be there in a few years. :)

Mike Wilhelm said...

Hi Paul...Yes they will! These times are so special but they are passing so fast. I know you are like me and trying to make the most of them! Say hello to Jenny for me!